Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. Psalm 90:14









Well, in some respects we are quite happy for the distractions of the holiday season. Friday was a great day for us. Two hours of pure joy. All the kids played, talked, and had a great time. J's older brother almost cried when it was time to leave, and those of us that did stay behind cried a little. It was so overwhelming. We can't even begin to describe how our hearts are stretched and pulled right now. We glimpsed at the family we desire for two hours yesterday, and it was perfect.

We do not know at this time, if yesterday will become a reality. To say that we have not prayed for this, and even at times, begged God to allow this to happen would be an understatement. We have turned to Him so many times for wisdom, strength and faith to guide us through this process. We are confused. We don't understand "the system."

It's the waiting, the not knowing that hurts the most. That brings you to tears at odd times. And yet does He not say to us, "If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer?" We have prayed that the little J's brothers would make it home here. We have prayed that we would be able to parent those little boys in a family environment that was free from the life they have lead to this point. That continues to be our prayer. And yet, we are so thankful that God chose us to be J's parents. We just feel so blessed, and yet we are longing for more. If that makes sense.

So, in short, we don't know what to think. We are confused, at times feel alone, and can't understand the system. But we know, that we will continue to be in prayer for those boys, and for our peace.

We know that many are praying on our behalf and we are thankful for that. We know that the outcome will be revealed, and we just pray that we have favor.

In the meantime, we will continue to do what we do everyday, and believe me that keeps us busy!! The big J's opening game is tonight, and we are very excited to see him play. His birthday is Monday (sweet 16, although not so much for boys LOL) so the week will be starting on a very high note for us!

The girls are excited to see the Christmas Break in the near future. Peppermint has arrived, and kept everyone on their toes. The little J just doesn't quite know what to make of him. Sometimes he likes him, sometimes he scares him... He was very intrigued by the move. He kept checking both places to make sure there was only "1". Anymore than that would probably set him over!

As we were driving in last night, the holiday lights seemed to cheer our blue mood. Our faith leads us to believe that He does make Everything glorious.

"Then maidens will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow." Jeremiah 31:13

David Crowder - Everything Glorious

The day is brighter here with You
The night is lighter than its hue
Would lead me to believe
Which leads me to believe

(chorus)
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours
What does that make me?

My eyes are small but they have seen
the beauty of enormous things
Which leads me to believe
there's light enough to see that

(chorus)
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours

From glory to glory
You are glorious You are glorious
From glory to glory
You are glorious. You are glorious
Which leads me to believe
why I can believe that


You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
You make everything glorious
And I am Yours

From glory to glory From glory to glory
You are glorious. You are glorious.
You are glorious. You are glorious.

Under Construction

Pardon our dust! We are changing seasons...
A long overdue post is coming.

Thankful All Year, NOT Just at Thanksgiving!!

Yep,,, I am ready, BUT I AM NOT, taking off my crocs... YOU Got THAT!!!

See, a donut can make everything better! J's surgery went great!

E & D -

The best smile!!!

B and B!!! One of her favorite basketball players!!

Yeah... basketball is here!! J's first game.

Starting Varsity for preseason nights! Woo-Hoo!

Go Wolfpack!

At the start of this school year I was determined to have a good year. I have the best summers, and the best school breaks and I wanted to carry that over into my school year. How would I accomplish that?? I would start my day with a devotional, and I would think of things that I was thankful for throughout the day. I would also give more things to God and worry less about what I could not control. It has really worked this year! While it seems we have been a lot busier than usual, I would not change it for anything..

And so I thought as I was shopping at Publix tonight.. I AM THANKFUL...

I am thankful for, God giving me to my parents, my siblings, my nieces and nephews, my friends, my faith, my church family, the feeling of always being loved. When I look back over my life, even when things haven't been what I thought they should I never suffered through addictions, homelessness, or hopelessness. When it was bad, it always seemed to get better, and when it was better I was able to clearly see how it got that bad! Usually I was my own worst enemy. I am so thankful after reconnecting with many of my old friends that they too share some of the same sweet memories of us growing up. It almost brings tears to my eyes to see how far we have come.

I am thankful that I have a husband who believes in God, and has strong values that he models for our children. I am thankful that God has blessed us so that we can bless others. I am most thankful for our children.. (real, fake, or other category!) that God has opened our hearts to give so much love. Our house is full of love, and full of fun. My children can grow up and see what it means to be the hands and feet of Christ. To love unconditionally, and to support in times of need.

I am thankful that no matter what, God loves me as much today as he has all my life. It is hard to imagine how great his unfailing love is. How is grace is sufficient for me. How really, all my troubles, he can handle.

It really is not even about "being positive", but rather believing that God has so many great things planned for me. It's the quiet times when I can just ask "What is it that I am supposed to be doing" and just feel at peace.

I am thankful that I have a house, a job, and money to pay my bills. Money to go to the grocery store and not worry about what I put in my cart.

I know that I have these rich blessings because Jeremiah 29:11 says

"For I know the plan I have for you", declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." I will continue to believe that God holds my family close, and that he knows our desires. I will trust in him to lead us through this process with J's brothers. I feel at perfect ease about our visit Friday, even though there are so many doubts. God knows even when we don't, and that is all we need to know.

So let's not be thankful, just this one day, but rather everyday stop and think what you have-- we have so much more than we could ever want- clean water, clean food, the ability to be who we want to be.

No News...

So. That just about sums up the day. No news on movement. Should be out by the holidays. What a mess. They are going to give us visits (first one will be the day after Thanksgiving). We left the meeting with DCF saying that they were going to do what was in the best interest of all three siblings. Let's just hope that they follow their own state guidelines, which to this point have NOT been followed.

So, like every good person that I know we are going to pack that little red hot mess into a box and place it on a shelf. Our guardians are going to handle some legal aspects for us, and they are much more capable than us!

Exciting news around here... basketball begins Wednesday! We will be able to make the game because it is AFTER church! Can hardly wait! And next week, only two days of school.

Yearbook meeting tomorrow! Then back to school Wednesday for a 1/2 day.

Have a great week!

Dive... Where we are now!

The long awaited rains Have fallen hard upon the thirsty ground

And carved their way to where

The wild and rushing river can be found

And like the rains I have been carried here to where the river flows yeah

My heart is racing and my knees are weak

As I walk to the edge I know there is no turning back

Once my feet have left the ledge

And in the rush I hear a voice That's telling me it's time to take the leap of faith

So here I go I'm diving in I'm going deep in over my head

I want to be Caught in the rush lost in the flow in over my head

I want to go

The river's deep the river's wide the river's water is alive

So sink or swim I'm diving in

There is a supernatural power In this mighty river's flow

It can bring the dead to life And it can fill an empty soul

And give a heart the only thing Worth living and worth dying for yeah

But we will never know the awesome power Of the grace of god

Until we let ourselves get swept away Into this holy flood

So if you'll take my hand We'll close our eyes and count to three

And take the leap of faith

Come on let's go

Meeting in the morning with DCF, The Guardian, The Centers and Kid's Central. It is really in the hands of God. We have people praying, we are going to fight, we are trusting that God will provide a way for the little j's siblings!

Could it be... that the mountain is moving?

We will be meeting Monday at 9:30- DCF, The Centers, Kids Central, The Guardians, Us.. Our prayers are that 2 boys will be recognized as siblings and not just another case in the system. That God will move the mountain and the little j can be reunited with his siblings. That God would show those at the table, that every child is a gift, and that no child should be left in a system when families are available. It has just been an emotional tug-of-war. It doesn't make sense and it doesn't have to be this way.
God has been faithful to us. He has provided us a prayer team that is amazing! We feel held.

Just Pray...

and that would just be the facts of life around here right now. Nothing like setting out on another wait journey. We closed the little j's adoption on the 26th. It was beautiful. We prayed for a week, and then on November 3 we set out on a careful and deliberate path to gain custody of little j's siblings who still sit in foster care almost 10 months later. Because the FACT is, there is not an alternative relative care plan available. If there was, the little j would have never been placed in adoptive status. In July when we attempted to have the boys moved we were told by the contracting agency The Centers that those boys would not be moved. In fact, their case worker was most concerned that we would ruin their heritage, if that was possible. During those conversations in July we were informed by the Supervisor of the Foster Division at The Centers that the little j had been placed inappropriately and they would attempt to get him back. It was a very disturbing phone call. One that would haunt us on a daily basis until the 26th. We immediately contacted our guardian and case worker and were told to not make any more moves to obtain the brothers until the little j's adoption was safely behind us. It was a grueling 3 months.. with lots of petitions and objections flying all around us. Thank goodness for our Judge, who under NO circumstances would budge on the issue of moving the little j. The Centers in fact had become the playground bully. They were willfully abusing powers and denying the little j placement with his siblings.
After much thought and prayerful consideration complaints were filed November 3. There was a list, and we felt like we would start at the bottom and work our way to the top. We did not want anyone to feel that we were simply angry, but that serious abuse had come to us and toward 2 siblings from workers at The Centers. We started at The Centers and then went to Kids Central, on over to the Ombudsman, and then to Senator Wise's office. It wasn't until we reached Senator Wise's office did we feel that we were being taken seriously. Senator Wise's office got that it had become extremely personal. I must say God was very present in that office, in that conversation, and in that afternoon. When I left there Friday I felt like for the first time, that I had finally done everything possible to make a reunification happen. At that point, I had a prayer team in place and they committed to pray every day until we have a resolution.
We received a call from DCF Saturday morning and spent about 2 hours on the phone with them reviewing the case. What we are asking is not impossible, and when we talk to anyone NOT at THE Centers, it seems that what we are asking for is logical. We are again in a five day review period. We are praying for a placement before Thanksgiving. We are praying for resolution that will not make us explain to the little j that the State would not give us his brothers. We are praying for peace...
We are, and we know that God had blessed us... we have been still, we have been held... it is an emotional battle where human feeling are involved. We don't know what the outcome will be, but we pray that whatever it may be we can find peace with it.

Other than the emotional wreck of a roller coaster last week, we have been extremely busy. The Big J's last game is this Friday, then he has two basketball games next week. So, we are changing sports, but still keeping busy with him. M & B are getting ready for company performances in January, so they are practicing like crazy. School is a blur... a total blur... so much is going on, it seems like the days just slip by. We are crazy busy with assessments this year. It is amazing how much we test...

We are looking forward to the Thanksgiving Break. The little j is going to have a small surgical procedure that Wednesday, so we are just hanging around the house that weekend. Hopefully some black mulch will get put out, and beds cleaned out for winter. Christmas lights will go up, and 'Tis the Season will roll right in. Who knows though.. we may have a house full, and well just spend time hanging out! WHO KNOWS....
We are off Wednesday, so I will do a real update, just trying to get a lot of information out there.
If I haven't returned your call, it was for several reasons.. one I had a real hard time last week, way to emotional to talk about this any more than I had to, and two.. we still have our hectic life with who we have, and to not short change anyone, I was trying to keep all those little ball bouncing! I will get back with you though... soon :-) Remember, I am off Wednesday!!!!

Welcome Fall....

Say cheese... our annual trip to the pumpkin patch!

My nice smirk... can't you tell I am spoiled????

Not sure where the Little J gets this goofy smile????

Warts on pumpkins... who would have thought?

A nice warty pumpkin! I bet it is still there!!!!

All kinds of cool pumpkins!

I can't believe I am seeing all these pumpkins! I thought they were hiding in the cornfield!

Let's see how long Little J can stay in the wagon....

For exactly two shots... that's how long!

I have been a lot of places in my life, but this I have never ..... a blue pumpkin????

He ran, and he ran, as fast as he could! He could not believe all the pumpkins that stood!

M found this very unique looking pumpkin! She could not believe her eyes!

There were so many pumpkins and gourds all around! We had a great time at the Pumpkin Patch! I don't think the Little J knew what to think! He would not take a picture, so when he laid down on the floor... ahhh the perfect shot!

Pure delight! He loved this slide! Even those sweet boys who carried him up!

This is a great thing our church does! My kids just love it!

Face painting anyone??

The M even let them paint her face!

Fall Festival at our church! It was a great day! The Little J played for two hours straight! Running around, just having a ball with his little friends from church!

On the field for homecoming!

Friday night lights ... almost over! 2 more games, and then we will be in basketball season! I can hardly wait! Although we have made everyone of the Big J's games, and he has had a great season, I still prefer basketball!

The Little J has started doing all kinds of weird poses.. Not sure if he is Pictured OUT! HA!

The Little J "caught" this at the Homecoming Game! He then proceeded to fill it with small rocks! He had a blast!

The "Duke" of 9th Grade!

As they started to come outside, I lined them up!

A great group shot....

The Big J and the Little J!
There are only 32 days left until our big Winter Break! And this year, might I add, we have a great break! 18 days of NO SCHOOL!!! And, we do not come back until the 4th! I love that! I don't like it when it we return to school on the 2nd! It surprises me how fast this year has flown by. We have been involved in so many activities already, it just seems like yesterday we were getting ready to start. At this pace, summer will be here before you know it!

The weather is finally cool today too! A plus for this time of year. It is supposed to be in the mid 70's all week, which is great for us here! Yesterday it was in the 90's! I will be glad when I can turn my a/c off for good!

I can't believe Thanksgiving is almost here! I really can't believe that Christmas is peeking from around the corner! The girls are learning Christmas music for our church musical, and it is just such fun music! It is going to be a great performance by our kids at church.

We are a blessed family! We continue to see God's presence in our lives and we continue to be amazed at all the wonderful things he has in store for us.